


Hello, My Meaningless Existence

by JayKat



Category: Original Work
Genre: Action/Adventure, Apocalypse, Disease, F/M, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-03-26 07:14:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13852722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayKat/pseuds/JayKat
Summary: Hello.You're seeing the story through my eyes, sorry if I bore you.Welcome to this Apocalyptic hell that we call a home.I hope you stick around to enjoy it, my darlings.





	1. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello.   
> You're seeing the story through my eyes, sorry if I bore you.  
> Welcome to this Apocalyptic hell that we call a home.  
> I hope you stick around to enjoy it, my darlings.

* * *

 

 Hello, my existence.

Are you there?  
Are you cold?  
Are you scared?  
It's okay.  
Because we'll make it through this.  
Together!  
I'll prove it to everyone.  
You are here.  
We are here.  
Everyone is here.  
So come on.  
Join us.  
Just one.  
Quick.  
Bang.

1.  
You know, everyone has a longing desire to know what death is like or what their existence means. But do they truly understand what it means to exist? In my opinion, it's not about looking for a reason to go on, it's about living the way you want and finding things that you can enjoy in your lifetime.  
That is until now.  
For whatever reason something...strange has been happening to people.  
Everyone walking around like mindless zombies. Husk of a human being.  
A walking corpse.  
All over the city. Like something out of a movie.  
I also have noticed myself in this same pattern but I snap myself of it. When this, I guess disease, hits me I get these flashes of images. It can very from people killing themselves, a sea of blood, or worst of all…  
Pure darkness.  
I can't hear. I can't smell. Touch, taste, nothing. Every sense is gone.  
But I still exist.  
And once It's over I always drop to my knees and vomit. It's a sickening experience.  
I'm not sure if I'm the only one that can snap out of these hallucinations but I know I'm the one that can find out how to stop them, and save everyone!  
“Alex..”  
Who was that?  
“Alex…”  
The voice starts getting louder. Colder. Darker. As it draws closer.  
“Oh. Ha, it's you? Why did I think I could shake this nightmare and it wouldn't try it's hardest to bring me back in?”  
“Alex.”  
“Gotta bring back those old demons, ay? Sorry darling, prays to you. I love you.”  
“You left me alone.  
You left me in the cold.  
The darkness.  
Alex.  
Alex.  
Alex.  
I still you love you…  
I forgive you...  
A L E X!!!!”  
The illusion of someone very dear to me jumps at me, screaming in a hellish voice. But as long as I don't acknowledge it and keep away from it's darkness it'll vanish.  
You know I was never sure if guns work on these things. But who cares, I've got to to keep on going after all.  
I pull back the hammer of the gun I was carrying on me, take aim, and get ready to fire. Bang.  
2.

The illusion explodes into a bloody spray of guts and excrement. Still trying to get to me huh?  
Soon after, everything evaporates as if nothing had transpired here. Instead of a hellish nightmare I'm back on the abandoned roads once again.  
Sorry, guess I have some explaining to do. My name is Alex Cauffin and I am a 23 year old widow with no children. This series of events have been going on for 3 years but they were in small cases. Now it's spread worldwide. You can fight the disease as hard as possible but it will still affect you whether now or later.  
This disease causes the following: nausea, temporary auditory and visual failure, hallucinations, insanity, and finally…  
The will to not go on anymore.  
Death.  
The name of this disease is called Death’s Door.  
Everyone with this disease strives for it. In these last 3 years the population has decreased to a total of 10.8 million due to suicides and murders.  
But honestly I'm not even sure if that many are left. Just wishful thinking.  
Everyone seems to fear the thought that they don't truly exist and aren't real. It's a common fear to have once or so in your life but the disease amplifies this x100 and makes whoever has it wish for death and act upon it. Maybe it's a type of parasite? But then how could it spread worldwide? Is it a type of airborne parasite? But then how would it go unnoticed this long for no one to find out about it? So many mysteries that I'm not really sure I can solve on my own, but is there really anyone else out there that can help me?  
I continue walking down this seemingly endless road when I noticed something strange.  
It might be the cause of Death’s Door but it’s most definitely-  
“A person…”  
As I quicken my pace I unholster my gun in case anything should go awry. Besides the end result of suicide some people have taken upon themselves to relieve humanity of this curse and kill them off themselves. This could also be another effect of the disease but right now it just seems like some rogue cult doing whatever they want. In the case of it's an illusion...in case it's her, this gun should take care of it. The thing about Death's Door is that these illusions become your reality, meaning they can, and will, hurt you or lure you into your inevitable death. It varies from person to person what the their haunting vision is but mine is something...very chilling. This isn't the first time I've had to kill her and it most certainly won't be the last as long as I continue to breath.  
I was lost in thought and didn't realize I was already so close to the being. They don't seem to notice me since they're rummaging through what appears to be a backpack. Is it there's?  
I ready my gun as I prepare myself for the worst. “Hey.” I said  
They turn around, frightened  
“AH-” they start to yell but quickly quiet themselves.  
What appears before me seems to be some sort of woman, maybe 18 or so, in tattered rags and disheveled hair like she's just emerged from sort of hole in the ground. She has bright green eyes, brown hair, and this strange tattoo on her right hand  
“999”  
Strange. That's all I can think of.  
“Uh-hm, so whaddya want? You with the Death's Door?” The girl says.  
“Death's Door? How could I be working with the disease?” I say, still aiming.  
“I'm talking bout the cult, moron. They named themselves after the disease.”  
“...Keep talking.”  
“Not until you stop aiming that gun at my head.” She says  
“Think of it as a precautionary measure.” I smirk  
“...”  
Am I getting the silent treatment from a hostage?  
“Sigh. Fine I'll lower it. Now start talking.” I say annoyed.  
“You're not such a bad guy, old timer!” She says letting out a small laugh.  
“JUST TALK! And I'm not old I'm only 23.”  
“Yeah yeah, whatever. So Death's Door is the short version of their organization. The full name is Death's Door Marchers. Instead of the disease trying to make someone kill themselves, there's a small chance that a instead of yourself dying, you live to kill others and set them free of their ‘meaningless existence.’” she says.  
“So, is this cult still up and running?” I ask.  
“Who knows. With only 100,000 people left they might've figured that humanity can't recover and offed themselv-”  
“Did you just say...100,000 people left?”  
“Yeah? What's the big deal? It's basic knowledge nowadays.”  
I fall to my knees. 100,000? 100,000...out of 7 billion...are gone. In the span of 3 years, this cult and diseased wiped out 95% of the population…  
What am I doing? Can I save anyone? Is it even worth saving anyone? Some please tell me…  
Please…  
Please.  
SOMEONE TELL ME!  
Please tell me…  
Angie…

“Hey hey.  
Alex, my love.  
Are you there?  
Are you cold?  
Are you scared?  
It's okay.  
Because we'll make it through this.  
Together!  
I'll prove it to everyone.  
You are here.  
We are here.  
Everyone is here.  
So come on.  
Join us.  
Just one.  
Quick.  
Bang.”  
To Be Continued.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading the first entry to my first series.  
> If you'd like follow me on twitter @Weebyexpress if you wanna see more of my stuff or just interested in what I do!  
> Have a good day and I'd love if you stuck around.


	2. Companion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, all we need is a friend.  
> Alex continues his encounter with this strange woman.  
> Who could it be? What could she be?

 

* * *

Hello. How are you?

Are you sad? 

Are you lonely?

Are you cold?

Don't worry!

I will assist you through your pain.

After all

You are my husband, right?

Aren't I supposed to love and care for you? 

Oh well.

Not like I'm real or anything.

After all…

 

Didn't you kill her? 

 

**_1._ **

It's happening again, huh? 

I lost control and let her take me over. 

Again. 

“...ey…”

As my senses start coming back to me I hear a faint voice.

“...hey…”

Why am I also feeling something...poking me?

“Heeeyyyy wakey wakey old timer!” 

“Guh!” 

I sit up gasping for air. My senses shot at me all at once like I've just woken up from some sort of coma. 

“Forgot that feeling a long time ago. And hey, what were you doing to me while I was out?” I ask the girl standing next to me. 

“Mmm just messing around, Alex!” She says 

“How do you kno-” before I can even ask I noticed she swiped my wallet while I was out,

“You little sneak.” I say aggravated.

“Ehehe~ hey it's not like there's no use for money in this world now anyways!”

She says with a smug grin on her face. 

I hop up and grab my wallet out of her and and put it back in my pocket. 

“Jeez the nerve of kids today.” I say.

“June.” 

“Huh?”

“The names June. It is only natural to introduce oneself!” June says. “Now it's your turn! Not that I don't already know hehe!” 

“Sigh, my name is Alex Cauffin and I'm, well used to be, a cashier at a convenience store.” I say.

“Really a cashier?? But you seem like there's so much more to you than some simple cashier!” She says somewhat annoyed. “Nope nothing. Sorry there's not much about me.” I say. 

“Hmmm okay. Do you have any kids?” She ask. “Nope.” I say. “What about a wife?” 

Alex…

I miss you Alex…

Don't you want m-

_ Bang! _

I fire my gun into the air to bring myself back to reality. “Tch, waist of a bullet. I'm sorry if I scared y-” as soon as I was about to finish I notice something. 

June is lying on the ground, rocking back and forth, like a infant. 

“I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm-” she keeps repeating.

I try shaking her but she won't stop. What's going on?

“June…” I grab her by the shoulders “JUNE!”.

She looks up at me. Her eyes look like green puddles that used to glimmer brightly but have been ruined with filth. 

“...Alex…” She says under her breath.

“It's okay kid I'm here. What happened?” I ask she doesn't say anything. The only thing she does it grab me and holds me tight. Why is she holding someone she just met so strongly? 

June...who are you?

 

**_2._ **

I sit next to June in dead silence. She's leaning against me like a child who's tuckered out from playing all day. What do I do in this situation.

“Hey June, I've been thinking, we've been standing in this spot for awhile so how about we get a move on?” I say with a smile. 

June looks at me dazed. Did I say something weird? “...ank you…” Says June under her breath. I couldn't make out what she said but she stands up and is in the same upbeat and carefree attitude she had a couple of minutes ago. I can't help but put a smile on my face. 

After all this is the first time I've had a companion in 3 years.

“Well come on, Alex! We gotta get a move on!” June says. “But where exactly are we going? I've never been in this state before so I was just wondering around.” I say depressingly. 

“Hehehe looks like it's up to the magnificent June to get things moving!” 

“What do you m-”

“The cult! Don't you want to find out more ‘bout it? It might lead to finding out the true cause of this disease! Also possible it could save the rest of humanity~” says June with a strange sparkle in her eyes. 

“Well I do want to learn about this cult, but do you really think we can save humanity? There's only 100,000 or so left right? “ I question while slowing down my pace. “Psh so? Once we figure out a cure we can start rebuilding society!” June says coming to a halt.

“Why're are you so upbeat? There's a killer disease and a malicious cult but you're so cheery and kind. What drives you?” 

“Well, if we're gonna be partners I might as well talk you some things about me. To be honest I've never really had friends growing up. Everyone thought I was some sort of freak for being so happy all the time, but the truth is I've always had this overwhelming sadness even at a young age. So I try my best to be as happy and positive as possible so I don't hurt others but, it seems like it had the opposite effect hehe.” June says with a pain filled smile.

I'm starstruck. This innocent, bright young girl has been dealing with this hidden cloud of sadness for god knows how long. 

Wait a minute.

The number.

_ 999. _

“Hey June, can I see that numb-” as I reach out to touch her right hand June screams.

“ **_STOP!”_ ** June yells as she jumps back.

“Please stop hurting me. Please let me go home. Kill me. I don't want to live. Just please stop.” She says while quivering and near to tears. 

_ Stop _

_ Stop _

_ Please _

_ It hurts _

_ Stop _

Angie…

I will not make the same mistake twice.

“June!” I grab June into my arms, her body still shaking. “I don't know what has happened to you and I can't imagine it. I know we just met but I want you to know, I will keep you safe! So believe in yourself and believe in me! It's a lot to ask for but I will do my best to give you the future you've always wanted.” 

“Alex…” June says.

**_“WAAAAAAAHHHHH!”._ **

She starts to wail, like she's been holding in all these tears her whole life. I just hold her till she stops crying which seems endless. 

“Heh, you really are still just a child, huh?” 

 

**To Be Continued**


	3. Ruins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey, did ya miss me?   
> Anyways we greet our two "heroes" being greeted by the ruined city: Altatia.  
> Hope you all enjoy their adventures, I know I will.

 

* * *

Is this my punishment?

If so, I’ll gladly accept it.

But man, it’s so much harder to handle than I thought.

 

Hey Angie…

What would you do in my shoes?

 

**_Well…_ **

**_I’d kill you._ **

 

**_1._ **

“Hey Alex…” Said June.

“Yeah?” I said.

“Do you think we’ll find anyone there?”

“Hey weren’t you the one that was telling me the cult was in this town?” I said somewhat annoyed. “Well yeah but I’m not really all that sure, they move around quite a bit, ya know? Secrecy and all that!” June says. 

_ Sigh _

This has been a rollercoaster of a day. But honestly, can’t tell you how good it feels to be able to talk to someone other than illusions.

Can’t tell June that though, seems like the type that if you pay her a compliment she’d get a big head and egg you on about it.  Actually, now that I get a better look at her, she’s pretty small.

Brown hair with straight cut bangs, green eyes, and tattered hoodie and jeans. All the things I noticed before but now that I’m relaxed she’s actually kinda cute. How did a small girl like this make it out on her own? And what about that number on her right hand? She’s a mystery alright.

“Hey, Alex! You just gonna stand there? The cities not far now!” Said June.

“Ah, coming.” I say not realizing I had stopped in my tracks. 

I continue to walk, catching up to June who’s been walking while I was deep in thought. 

  
  
  


“Well we made it! Welcome to Altatia, my trusty companion.” Says June in this very strange navigator type voice.

“Yes, yes I’ve been here before, June. Still the same as I left it.” I said. 

“Hell, even smells the same. Really do hate this place.” 

“Well jeez, you’re a real downer ya know that?” Says June somewhat grumpy.

“Sorry, just bad memories is all. Plus doesn’t help that apparent world enders have set their roots into my hometown but, ya know, whatever.”

“Oh wow, I didn’t know this was you home! I’m sorry if I said something insensitive.” Said June, apologetic. “But you shouldn’t talk bad bout it! I quite frankly like this place. After All it’s the place where I met someone special…” 

“Huh, interesting.” I said. “Was it some type of boyfriend or something like that?” 

“GOD NO!.” Said June embarrassed. 

“Jeez, NOW who’s the insensitive one?” 

“Hey I’m not the one getting flustered over a question.” 

“Shut up!” Said June angrily. 

June walks towards the city in a fast pace. Guess she really is upset. 

“Hey June, whenever you feel like be sure to tell me bout that someone, yeah?” I ask trying to cheer her up.

She ignores me. Jeez, are all teenagers like this? Honesty can’t say I don’t enjoy it though. It's been awhile since I could have fun with someone. 

 

**_2._ **

Ruins. Buildings covered in greenery. Broken windows, rusted cars, and especially:

No trace of life. Altatia used to be a very bright and blooming city, filled with people. But now it’s dark, no neon lights or anything to be seen. 

Clubs, Grocery stores, schools, all destroyed. It looks as if some kinda bomb wiped out most, if not all, of this place. 

“June, how is the cult here if there’s nothing here but dirt and rumble.” I said. 

“Relax, you’re too impatient! Say, how ‘bout we stop by somewhere and rest up? It’s getting late after all.” June says. 

“Okay? Do you see  _ anywhere _ to stay?” I say begrudgingly. “Hmmm, Ah that place doesn’t look too bad!” Says June excited. It appears to be still somewhat standing and intact building, well as intact as you can get. Windows shattered, Door hanging off its hinges, and can’t imagine what the inside looks like. We get closer to the building and it appears to be some sort of apartment, maybe 4 stories or so. Completely deprived of any color it used to have, the sign only has the letters “Wel” “e” “o” “The” “Ga  en”, can’t make heads or tails out of it. “Well, let's not waste time now, aye?” I say somewhat teasing a very timid June. 

As we enter the building we notice that, of course, everything appears to have dulled and withered over time. But for some reason it feels like this place has been ransacked, do to the slashed curtains, burnt carpet and couch, it’s too much to have just decayed over time. Especially these burn marks; on closer examination they appear to be, fresh? Or rather recent I should say. 

“Hey can you stop playing Mr. Detective? I’m ready to hit the hay.” June says groggy. 

“Alright fine, lets try finding decent rooms.” I say somewhat tired myself. 

We go to the third floor of the apartment building and rummage through the rooms, finding two decent ones. “Alright, I’ll take the right one. Seems the left has much better bed and I’m pretty much used to sleeping uncomfortably so you take it.” I say. 

“Are you sure? I really don’t mind sleeping in a messed up bed.” Says June feeling sympathetic. “Oh! How ‘bout we sha-” June stops talking and starts to blush. 

“Um, nevermind! Goodnight!” Says June as she runs into her room and slams the door. Wonder what she was saying. 

I enter my room, seems I was right about the bed not being in the  best shape. The bathroom is surprisingly in good shape. There’s a desk with a lamp on it by the wall in front of the bed. The view is as you expect, just the sight of other decaying buildings. 

I lay down in the bed, I honestly forgot what a bed feels like albeit a bit bumpy. “Wait, what is this poking me in the back?” I say as I get up to move the blanket. “A book?” I say. It appears to be a leather diary of some sorts. It has no name on it and the title of it only has a tattered date: J 10 XX. What this journal had to offer me was very little. There’s stuff here about plants, rain, a comic shop. Jeez who owned this? 

But something then caught my attention, something shocking and chilling at the same time.

**Code: 999 has escaped.**

 

**To Be Continued.**


	4. Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Normal days don't always last.  
> Sky's will fall.  
> People will starve.  
> Casual days are in for our protagonist.  
> But for how long?

**1.**

Code: 999? What is this? This has to be some weird coincidence right? 

My mind boggles, trying to understand why the tattoo on June's arm is in this book. Of course there's no picture of her or any info that I can make out but, something just feels off.

“I'll ask her in the morning. No use trying to ponder this while exhausted.” I said, starting fade in and out.. 

I place the book in my back pocket, lay on my back and try to rest. 

 

“Alex...help me...please…” 

“Honey, what's happening to you?!”

“I...I don't know. Alex,I don't want to die. Please help me. I'm scared…”

“Please, help m-”

 

“AH!” I yelled, risen out of my bed, panting. 

I place my palms on my head. “It was just a dream. It was just a dream. A dream. A dream. A dream a dream a dream a dream a-” 

“Alex!” Says June with a concerned look on her face.

“June?” I say while holding my chest unconsciously.

“You were screaming in your sleep, I didn't know what to do! I was so worried!” 

“I'm sorry for worrying you, please don't wor-” before I can finish my sentence June interrupts me. “OF COURSE I'M WORRIED!” June says with tears forming in her eyes. 

“I don't want to be alone again. I'm scared of being left alone, especially if the person that leaves me is the first person to not call me a freak in years!!” 

“June I…” June latches onto me. I felt all her sorrow, fear, and grief from the cry. 

I give her a hug in return. “June, thank you for caring ‘bout me. Just let out that cry and then we have to have a talk, okay?” I said as gently as possible. 

After a couple of minutes June settled down. “Thanks, Alex, I really appreciate it.” Said June, her face still flushed. “Eh don't sweat it, you are my partner after all, right?” I said with a smile, trying to cheer her up. 

“Now June, I need you to tell me the full truth. Do you know what that number on your arm signifies?“ I said as calm as possible. 

“ I…” June tries to gather her thoughts. Was this too much pressure on her? “ I don't remember fully, I just remember bits and pieces. I remember something about a test, a angel, pain, darkness, it's all jumbled up in my head and when I try to remember, it feels like I want to vomit.” June said, somewhat trembling.

“It's okay, June. Thank you for telling me this, I greatly appreciate it.” I said with my hand on her shoulder. “The reason I asked you this was because of this book. It's missing pages and some are too worn to read. There was however one thing that caught my eye, code: 999.  _ Your  _ tattoo. That's why I had to ask you what is it.“ I said trying to explain.

June just sat there awestruck. She didn't know what the journal was or anything else about it. But for some reason she had this, scarred look on her face, like a deer in headlights. 

“June…” 

“I'm okay! Really, I'll be fine“ She said with a sad demeanor. 

“I just… please don't be afraid of me.“ She said cautiously. A determined look on her face.

“Afraid? Of you? Come on, dumm-“

“Are you afraid of me?! Please, just tell me.“ She said with her eyes full of tears again.

“June, I'm not afraid of you nor will I ever will be. Right here and right now you're the only one I can depend on. We’ll find out your missing memories, stop the cult, and get some ice cream together, okay?“ I said smiling. 

June stands up and walks towards the door. “You're a weird guy, ya know that? She said whole giggling. 

“The weirdest.“

June exits my room. I wasn't sure of it, but I can tell she was smiling. 

Because I was smiling too.

 

**2.**

We took another night to rest and headed out. we had enough food to spare us a bit longer but we decided to look for some more rations. We start by searching a nearby convenience store, albeit most likely empty.

I rummage through the shelves and June looks through the coolers. 

“Hey, Alex, look what I found!” Says June excited.

“Is it a beer? I haven't had a drink in a long time.” I said. “No, but it is something drinkable!” June runs up to me and shows me what appears to be a blue bottle with fruit imprints all along the the bottle.

“These are absolutely the best!” Says June all jittery and jumpy. “They're called Plops! They come in blueberry, strawberry, cherry and a lot more! What you do is you push the cap in, it burst back out, and boom! You now have a fizzy fruity drink! Isn't that so cool?!?!” June says ecstatic, practically bursting with excitement. 

“Yeah it's pretty neat, but is it even still good? Who knows how old it is.” I said.

“Well, let's see.” June says while trying to find the label. “Ah, found it. Looks like it expired 2 years ago. Darn I was really hoping it'd still be good.”

“Why're you still putting it in your backpack?”

“Oh just for nostalgia. Who knows it could be a collectible!” 

“Well I guess. Plus if we gotta we can drink it if we need to. Now let's get back to looking” I said.

We go back to rummaging around the store. We scrap by with some water and a box of some cereal. Our next stop is a suburban area. Maybe some people left some food or something, at least I hope. 

“Alright June, let's go.” I say.

We head into the first house. It was a average house, outside was brick with a white door and two windows. The patio has definitely seen better days, covered in greenery and the white turning into a greenish brown. We enter the house, the door almost coming off the hinges. I search the kitchen and June searches the upstairs.

After some time had passed, I didn't come up with much. “No luck, huh? Maybe June fo-” I get cut off before I can finish my sentence. 

“AAAAAAA!”

“JUNE!” I shout as I bolt upstairs. 

I make to the room June's in. “June are you-”

I see June on the floor, looking at the wall in utter shock. I look before me and...

I don't know what to do. 

My eyes widen, my hands drop to my side. 

“What...what is this.”

On the wall, written in blood and entrails. With the body that was used for it hanging right next to it: 

_ Come home. We miss you. _

_ Our Angel. _

 

**To Be Continued.**

 


End file.
